List of Pointless Lies I Tell Strangers

1. I am one year older than I am actually am.

2. I used to work giving graveyard ghost tours.

3. I like animals.

4. I am allergic to a number of medications, but I don’t know which ones.

5. My feet have been shrinking since I was a teenager.

6. I make an excellent vegan cheese casserole.

7. I care about their political beliefs.

8. I want to be their friend. I want to be their friend. I am capable of being a friend.

9. I have had the same haircut my entire life.

10. I have this weird thing, a “perversion” I guess, where I always have to keep my mouth open and my tongue out when I am going down a waterslide.

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2 Comments

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2 responses to “List of Pointless Lies I Tell Strangers

  1. Haha do people ask for proof of number 5?

  2. Yes. I carry a picture of myself as a child in giant clown sneakers.

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