List of Things I Would Like to Discover Upon Cracking an Egg for Breakfast

1. A billion dollar gold coin with my picture on it.

2. A small, fully mature, French-speaking, chicken

3. Another egg and another egg and another egg and so on, like Chinese Boxes or Russian Dolls.

4. A white light that blinds me. Good joke, Mom…

5. A golden ticket to a fantastical industrial chicken farm that has been closed to the public and reporters for years.

6. A large spider. I would never eat an egg again i don’t think. Or, my diet would become very spider-heavy.

7. A list that actually helped me deal with important things in my life.

8. A gnome or a Mogwai or a pink dinosaur. Something cute like that. Smoking maybe. Or huffing glue.

9. My own reflection, winking at me and saying, “Still like those eggs runny, dontcha, Timbo?”

10. Eternal life for me and my homies.

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1 Comment

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One response to “List of Things I Would Like to Discover Upon Cracking an Egg for Breakfast

  1. You should do one of these once a week. List of things I would like to discover…when scratching my armpit etc….

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